This blog has always been for me and my memories. Now I have a little pea (soon to be pumpkin) that I'd like to share my thoughts, love and dreams with. This is going to be my forum. I may be mushy or too personal, but again, this is for me.
25 July 2013
Dear little pea,I don't even know you, but I know that I will love you so much that it already hurts. Some may have thought this day would never come. You see, your daddy and me do things our own way. It's not that we didn't want you in our lives. We know soon we won't even remember our lives with out you. But we needed 'us' time. One day I hope you too will fall so deeply in love that you'll want that 'us' time with your significant other. Your story begins after we had known each other for 12 years and celebrating 5 of those married. We wanted to have our home and be ready to bring you into a world so full of our love, that there's no way to escape it. After spending 24 amazing days traveling across Europe, we finally hit our five year mark and decided we should start 'trying' for a little Walker. I didn't want to be a person that stressed about getting pregnant or felt the pressure. I just wanted you to come when you were ready. If you happened right away, we would be thrilled, and if it took a little longer, we'd just have more of that 'us' time.
I still can't wrap my head around the fact that I am pregnant with you. Even saying that I am is strange. It's not that I'm not excited. I've spent many days daydreaming about you, but I've yet to see the doctor and get some confirmation (other than the take home test) that this is truly happening. I am (so far) lucky in that I don't have morning sickness or feel deadly tired. The most I've felt are some back cramps, a little tenderness and the ability to sleep like a rock. I've already been waking up around 4:30 AM, either having to go to the restroom, or your horse of a dog, Steel, wakes me up. I can't wait to get a confirmation that you are really in there, growing into the strong little human I know you'll be.
Love you to the moon & back,
B
Positive pregnancy test and telling the hubby...
I officially got a positive 'pregnant' test on the morning of July 18th. I had a feeling that I was, mostly because none of my normal monthly signals were there. I had taken one a few days earlier, but it still said no. I didn't want to jump to conclusions, so I just waited. I had decided after Monday to wait until Friday to take the next test. Obviously, I couldn't wait that long. D had just left for work, so upon finding out, I had to wait anxiously until that evening to tell him. I wanted to tell him in person. We had joked at our anniversary dinner about how he'd want me to tell him when it happened. His response was with a big bottle to scotch. So that day I ventured out to the store, with my little secret, and bought a really nice bottle of scotch. I was dying to tell someone, anyone, but knew this was something that was so special, he needed to be the first I told.
With my bottle of scotch, I decided to soften/cute it up a little bit/put my little touch on it. I made this cute tag and tassels to hang on the front. I had a meeting that night at 6:30 PM, so I figured I had just enough time to tell him before I had to leave. I kept looking at the clock and even text him around 5:50 to figure out where he was. Typically, he is home around 5:30 PM, but of course today was the exception. He was just leaving work around 6 PM. I didn't want him to find out with out me there. That would take all the fun out of it. I had to hide the bottle and test in the back section of the closet and run off to my meeting. I finally got home around 8 PM and immediately went into our room, dropped my stuff off and then into the bathroom. I took my phone, grabbed the bottle, put the test in my back pocket and text D to come into the bathroom. I was holding the bottle as he walked in and as he saw it, he kind of stopped. His first reply was both a little shocked and excited as he could only say one word, 'Really?' I think I said something like, "looks like it", and that started our little 10 minute mini celebration in the bathroom. I showed him the test, showed him how late I was and pulled up my calender to show him about when it was that it probably happened. Looks like our anniversary was a good week.
Pre-positive | Weeks 0 to 4
Size of Baby Walker smaller than .25 inches
Symptoms Not many. I had a few instances that I thought I felt a little nauseous, but I think that was in my head.
Cravings/Aversions None, other than my normal sweet tooth and Mexican food
Exercise This Texas heat is keeping me from running, but I had been trying to run about 3 times per week
Sleep I wasn't loosing any sleep over being late. I was just anxious to figure out what was happening. I did notice that I started sleeping really hard around when I found out.
Worries I naturally worry, but as I've gotten older, I try hard to not worry as much. Really, just letting life happen and I truly believe that things happen for a reason. I have such a great support system, I don't worry about bringing a little life into this world. I've also got a great team at work, so I know all my clients are going to be taken care of.
Best moment of the week Definitely the day we found out. I had to wait so long to tell D, the anticipation was killing me. It's been so great to tell each person and see their reaction. Finding out D's best friend is expecting was a great moment too! He actually text D and said 'You're going to be an uncle' and D's response was 'Not to steal your thunder, but you are too!'
Gender I'd like it to be a boy. I've always wanted a boy first, but honestly, I'll be in love either way. Oh, there are also twins in both of our families, so multiples? I don't think so, but there is a definite possibility.
Changes Hello world of no wine. I'd not say that I have to drink all the time, but man it's a different look on life when you can't have a glass of something in your hand. Here's to finding some tasty mocktails.
Looking forward to Finally going to the doctor. It's so strange to know you are pregnant, but not really have any symptoms. It will be nice to finally hear some confirmation.
Week 5
Size of Baby Walker smaller than .25 inches
Symptoms Thirst!! Holy cow, I didn't think it was possible to consume the amount of water and still be thirsty.
Cravings/Aversions None really
Exercise Still running a few days. It's amazing how sluggish and out of breath I feel. I know I can run much fast/longer than I have been, but I don't want to put unneeded stress trying to push myself. I'm just going for a good 30 minute run/jog/walk if needed.
Sleep No issues there. Although, I've had a few nights where I wake up and feel like I am wide awake. Good thing I have an iPhone and a Kindle to keep me occupied through the night, yet still in the comfort of my bed.
Worries I'm sure I had something to worry about this week, but I really can't recall. Most excitement for our first appointment
Best moment of the week Told a few more people this week, a friend and the 36th Street team at our meeting. I waited til the very end and then just basically blurted out something like the most exciting thing about the spring was that I'm pregnant. Telling that to 3 women was amazing, they were all so exciting and surprised. Needless to say they had no idea. I knew we wouldn't get anything done if I lead with the news. We talked all about it and plans for this little pea. Looks like the fun planning has already begun!
Gender Still think it's a boy. I haven't gotten D to really say what he wants, but I think he's thinking boy. He would be such a sucker for a little girl
Changes We got a new bed!! Finally, we invested in a memory foam mattress and not only did we get that upgrade, but it's also a king size bed. HECK YES. It's a whole new world when you actually have leg room.
Looking forward to finally being able to let everyone know. I'm not very good at keeping secrets, so I've probably over shared already. I don't care though, I want people to know.
Week 6
Size of Baby Walker .25 inches = size of a pea!
Symptoms Fatigue, really starting at 9 PM and hard to get motivation to get up in the mornings. Even harder the days that D stays home from work.
Cravings/Aversions D says that I've started the weird cravings already. I'm not really craving much, but I have thrown out some strange food options. Meatloaf, potatoes and peas isn't that crazy right? Maybe the green chili grits and shrimp was a little out there.
Exercise I've gone a few times. I want to try to run more, but if I don't do it in the morning, it's way too hot. D and I decided that we are going to try and exercise in the AM once he goes back to his normal schedule with school starting back.
Sleep Check! I can't get enough of it. I am not a napper and really thought about napping this afternoon.
Worries I did buy a scale this past week, so maybe that was a worry to write down. I don't want to be crazy about my weight, but I would like to stick to the normal 20-25 lb increase. Exercise will help that, so here is to more motivation. I also DO NOT want to get stretch marks, which means I probably will. I have gotten all kinds of lotions and an oil that I've already started applying 2 times a day. I know, I know, it's really genetics and how quickly you put on weight, but I can hope this will help too!
Best moment of the week Hands down, had to be hearing the heart beat and getting confirmation at our appointment. I also really enjoyed laying with D while he called his family and friends and told them about our bun in the oven. Nothing cuter than hearing your husband rave about how he's going to be a dad.
Gender I think in the back of my mind I'm preparing that it will be a girl, simply because I've thought it would be a boy.
Changes My mindset that I'm actually now only 6 weeks. Still weird to revert backwards. Looks like I'm on top of my reading, so that's good. We also changed the fan in our living room. One check off the list of things to do before Baby Walker arrives.
Looking forward to telling the rest of my extended family, many phone calls will need to be made!
Monday, August 5th
Our first doctors visit
We had our very first doctors appointment today. Busy with work, we rushed in the car to make our 1 PM appointment. My doctor's office is literally on the other side of Austin. It was nice to know how fast we could make it up there (if need be) when labor strikes. We kept joking that we better not run in to traffic the day the little bug finally comes. I'm sure I'll just be yelling (kind of like normal) at stupid drivers. I'm sure it will be something we laugh at for years to come.
We actually made it there in about 20 minutes and only about a minute late, oops. I checked in, filled out the needed paperwork, and they quickly had us go for our first sonogram. I'm not sure exactly what I expected, but they have you keep your clothes on and just lift up your attire to put the warm jelly on your belly. I was wearing a dress, so up it came. She was looking around (which felt like forever) to find my ovaries and found the sack that should show our little bug.
When she wasn't able to actually find the bug in the sack with the external sonogram, she started asking all about my period. What was my normal cycle? When the first day of my last period? Do you spot in between? They really don't encourage or give you hope that you may just be earlier than you thought. Well then I got sent in the bathroom to empty my bladder, so they could do the internal sonogram, which if I was just early, this would still show that the bug was still there.
I felt like this whole experience has to be very eye opening for the dads. I think his eyes got huge upon seeing the tool they use for the sonogram. After a little searching, she was able to finally see our little bug with the internal sonogram. It was there just hanging out, which was awesome. I mean really it doesn't look like much, just a little white spot in a dark sac. She took some measurements and based on the size she changed our due date (from what we thought was March 15th) to April 1st. Looks like I was really only at almost 6 weeks, not 8 like I thought.
I had a friend go through something similar, so it was nice to know I wasn't the only one. I think because I knew this, I didn't freak out quite as much during this whole process. She also said we could try to hear the heart beat, which this early she wasn't sure if we'd be able to hear. She was able to find the heart beat, which was absolutely amazing. The screen showed the whole little bug beating with the rhythm of the woofing sound coming out of the speakers. I don't think I could look away. It was so crazy to see. Once we got confirmation from the sonogram that I was actually preggos (yay!), we were sent back to the waiting room to meet with the nurse practitioner.
When our name was called, we made our way in to the next room, and I got the full run down from the nurse. I did have to pee in a cup, which is never a problem to provide at this point. In the room we waited for the doctor. I hadn't met her before, but she was great. Dr. Sweeton did the 20 questions of my background along with a full pap. She asked us if we had any other questions and sent us home with a hole bunch of papers/free pre-natals, goodies. I then got to schedule 3 more appointments for this month, so I'll practically live there. I get to go back next week to do another sonogram. The doctor said that literally the bugs heart could have just started yesterday, so the heart beat was a little lower than she would have liked, but it was normal. I get to do another one next week to hear it in the 150's, just to be sure. Then I get to go back in 4 weeks to see my actual doctor and a 3rd appointment on the 17th of September. This one is for the pre-screening for down-syndrome. D also got sent a whole sheet of items to ask our insurance, just to be sure they were covered.
Week 7
Size of Baby Walker .51 inches = size of a blueberry!
Symptoms
Cravings/Aversions Oh, so nothing sounds good to me. Even the things I would normally crave all the time. It's so weird to me. I've had some indigestion already, which doesn't make eating any more fun. I did really want fruit snacks the other night. In our 104 degree weather, I also was super happy to go get some soup for lunch at Whole Foods. Not strange at all, right?
Exercise Going for 3 days a week. So far, I've learned that I definitely need to bring water with me. I'm right at 30+ minutes and almost 3 miles when I do go out for a run. I'm going slower than normal, but I'm okay with that.
Sleep Still wonderful. I think I do sleep super hard and it makes my lower back hurt some.
Best moment of the week Sonogram #2 for sure! I got to go back in right on day 1 of week 7. Last week the heart rate was a little slow, as mentioned above, so they wanted to just double check. D had to work so I asked my mom to go. Let's just say she was beyond over the moon to attend. They didn't do sonograms when she was pregnant, so this was a whole new experience. Baby Walker is growing and right where the bug should be.
Gender Heart rate at 158... I'm thinking a girl.
Changes Had my first hot flash, darn hormones! That wasn't so fun. I also feel like I am already starting to show-ish. I don't think I've really gained any weight (I am tracking this) but sometimes when I sit, the belly is just there. Something that's definitely changed and I am NOT used to.
Week 8 - Got busy and missed this week!
Size of Baby Walker .63 inches = size of a kidney bean!
Week 9
Size of Baby Walker .9 inches = size of a grape!
Symptoms Tired, but more of an appetite. I will go from not hungry to starving.
Cravings/Aversions Chicken hasn't been as appetizing as I normal. I've also really liked soup still and meat loaf, peas and potatoes?
Exercise About the same. I ventured out about twice this week
Sleep Starting to be able to fall asleep a little faster, which is been nice with those early morning wake ups.
Worries We decided to take the first testing for down-syndrome this week, which is just an early indicator if something is wrong. I don't plan on terminating either way, but I like knowing and so does D.
Best moment of the week I woke up one morning around 3 AM and was starving. So much that I couldn't go back to sleep, so I ate a nice bowl of Cheerios by myself standing in the kitchen.
Gender I've decided that I'm leaning towards girl to even the playing field, since I've always wanted a boy
Changes I feel like I can see my stomach getting bigger, even through my weight has stayed the same.
Looking forward to a little vacation with the hubs to the east coast. I had my first wedding this weekend, and I definitely felt more exhausted than normal. Luckily, you're supposed to have more energy in the 2nd trimester, which is busy season!
September 3, 2013
Third Doctors Appointment
I was really excited to go to this doctor's appointment. I really wasn't sure what this one was going to involve, but I love my doctor, so I couldn't wait. I told D I wasn't sure either, so he didn't necessarily have to go with me. Since he has so much personal time, he decided to take the afternoon off and come along. I was SO glad he did.
The appointment was pretty easy. They went over my blood test from the last appointment, which I passed with flying colors. Then she had a portable device that allows her to hear the heart beat. She warned me that at 10 weeks, it's really hard to hear with it. If it didn't work, she said we'd just get another sonogram. Well, of course, the biscuit (that's D's new name of the little one) was being difficult. She said everything is looking great and if the heart rate was good, we were free to go.
Off to sonogram #3 in 10 weeks. I love them, so I was excited. D also hadn't seen one since the first appointment, which is a huge difference! We have the same tech do the sonogram each time, which I appreciate. Luckily my bladder fills up pretty quickly, since you have to give a urine sample at the beginning of each visit going forward (They are checking protein levels for pre-eclampsia), but the sonogram is better with a full bladder. The little biscuit was so much bigger! You could actually see parts and she was pointing them all out to us. She said that we have both legs and arms. Most we could see, but some angles her pointing them out really helped! We actually got to see the biscuit move, I was in awe! It was the coolest thing I've seen. D made jokes later, because during the sonogram the tech was pointing out the profile and said, 'you can see the nose'. D was like, "What's that supposed to mean?!?". Apparently the biscuit must have his nose. These pictures are amazing to me!
Size of Baby Walker 1.2 inches = size of a cherry!
Symptoms Feeling good this week. Got digestion going well, getting plenty of sleep and drinking lots of water has been helpful
Cravings/Aversions I feel like my appetite leans more towards carbs than I usually eat. Loving a bagel & cream cheese!
Exercise Still running 2-3 days per week. Feeling like I have a little more energy during my runs.
Sleep As much as I can
Worries Finding some maternity clothes that are not either completely hideous or outrageously expensive. Stretchy pants may be my best friends.
Best moment of the week Definitely the appointment we went to! I loved the sonogram and I think it became real seeing the biscuit being active.
Gender My friend said, after I sent over the sonogram image, that it has to be a girl! The biscuit is too cute not to be. :o)
Changes Weight is still good, but I feel like my belly is still growing.
Looking forward to Heading to see our friends that live on the east coast.
Week 11
Size of Baby Walker 1.6 inches = size of a brussel sprout!
Symptoms Every once in a while, I felt like I was a little nauseous, but it goes away so quickly that I can't tell if that's what it is. Mainly I feel this when I need to drink more water or eat.
Cravings/Aversions I did not eat very well this week. While visiting our friends, I wanted anything that was fried. I don't normally indulge, but I did some there. I also had to make a store run for some swedish fish!
Exercise I ran maybe once this week... Not as much as I'd like.
Sleep I slept pretty good this week. Even when we were traveling, sleeping on the air bed was still pretty great. I decided that I can sleep anywhere.
Worries Dreams have already started to be interesting, but I did have one where I went to the doctor and the dream seems like the dr was trying to tell me that something was wrong. I think it's just worries of the next appointment for early testing downs.
Best moment of the week Traveling to see our friends for sure. It was SO nice to just relax and watch the boys drink. I don't think I've laughed so hard in a while. D and his friend Matty have such childlish humor that I've learned to appreciate.
Gender Our friends are about 10 weeks ahead of us with a little girl. While there, Matty said that our biscuit would need to be a girl, otherwise, our boy couldn't come near theirs.
Changes Sleep has been a little less comfortable, but I've been finding I sleep mostly on my sides now. I may sleep a few times on my stomach, but trying to learn to enjoy side sleeping.
Looking forward to our next appointment to rule out a few things and gives me one less thing to worry about!!
September 18, 2013
Fourth Doctors Appointment
Today we had our fourth appointment were we did the first screening for Downs. I was a little nervous, but I figured it was better to find out, and there really is nothing that would change regardless. Well things are all healthy on our end, which is very exciting!! We got to do another sonogram today.
The biscuit was pretty lazy and not laying in the right position, so we got to watch it for about 10 minutes. If I would flex my abs, the biscuit would almost jolt in surprise. The biscuit also really liked to have one of it's hands by the face today. At one point, it looked like it was waving at us. I couldn't help but laugh, which really made the biscuit move! I love sonograms, they are SO cool. Once we were done there, we got to meet with my doctor, which the more I see, the more I love. We were pretty quick in this visit. She basically said that we are almost 98% sure that things are good with the biscuit's chromosomes, and she wouldn't suggest any other screenings. YAY!
The biscuit was pretty lazy and not laying in the right position, so we got to watch it for about 10 minutes. If I would flex my abs, the biscuit would almost jolt in surprise. The biscuit also really liked to have one of it's hands by the face today. At one point, it looked like it was waving at us. I couldn't help but laugh, which really made the biscuit move! I love sonograms, they are SO cool. Once we were done there, we got to meet with my doctor, which the more I see, the more I love. We were pretty quick in this visit. She basically said that we are almost 98% sure that things are good with the biscuit's chromosomes, and she wouldn't suggest any other screenings. YAY!
Week 12
Size of Baby Walker .49 ounces = size of a strawberry!
Symptoms My back has been hurting this week, but I think that's more with my sleeping positions vs the baby.
Cravings/Aversions I devoured some pizza this week with a friend. It was amazing. I also got some caramels from the store, which have been yummy.
Exercise Ran once with Steel and went on a short jog with the pups & a friend mid-week. It's been rainy here, so not much running outside.
Sleep I slept SO well Thursday night. I was exhausted around 8 PM, which I think was due to all the pizza I ate that night, and slept the entire night. I didn't even get up to use the restroom, which IS a feat!
Worries Feeling good about everything after our appointment!
Best moment of the week Telling my clients that I was pregnant! I definitely have to say I am spoiled and have the BEST clients. They are SO sweet to me. I've only been showered with love. I also bought my very first baby item this week. I had to get some shoes for the picture we used to announce we were expecting!
Gender My mom and my friend Katie think it's a girl. Katie said that it's just too cute not to be! D keeps referring to the biscuit as a boy. I told him he is going to be really surprised when it's actually a girl!
Looking forward to being able to finally post this!!! I feel like it's been so long.
